The tech mogul memorialized the momentous event in the most fitting way for the Facebook generation, by posting an update to his page that said: “Mark added a life event to May 19, 2012 on his timeline: Married Priscilla Chan.”

According to the Associated Press, Zuckerberg’s marriage to Priscilla Chan took place in front of about 100 invited guests who thought they were celebrating Ms. Chan’s medical school graduation. It all happened in Zuckerberg’s backyard.

The couple met while both were attending Harvard, and have been together for nine years.

Zuckerberg, 28, even took off his infamous hoodie for the wedding in favor of a dark blue suit and tie. The bride wore a white, body-fitting lace gown.

The Winklevoss Twins, who have sued Zuckerberg twice for “stealing” their idea for Facebook  - served as “best men” for the ceremony.   In their speech, the twins said that they were first ones to see Priscilla and believe that Zuckerberg stole her from them.

“It was our idea to date Priscilla. We introduced her to Mark and he stole her away,” said a Winklevoss.  ”We are going to sue to get full custody of her.”

The couple, who met at Harvard and have dated for nine years, deflected media attention by telling their guests they’d been invited to his home to celebrate Chan’s recent graduation from medical school — but then surprised the crowd by getting married instead. They had been planning the wedding for four months, People reported.

While he could afford to give her a diamond the size of an SUV, the Facebook billionaire gave Chan “a very simple ruby” that he designed himself, according to a guest authorized to speak for the couple.

Guests dined on food from the couple’s favorite restaurants, Palo Alto Sol and Fuki Sushi They had a desert of mouse-shaped chocolates that the pair ate on their first date nine years ago, according to People.

Chan, 27, graduated from the University of California, San Francisco on Monday, the same day Zuckerberg turned 28.

She plans to be a pediatrician.

Zuckerberg is Facebook’s single largest shareholder and controls the company with 56 percent of its voting stock. He is ranked 14th on Forbes’ list of richest Americans.

Zuckerberg grew up about 10 miles north of New York City in Dobbs Ferry .

Within hours of announcing his marriage, more than 220,000 people had “liked” the news on Facebook .

On May 5, 2012 the world will change as we know it.

The moon will be passing by for its closest visit in the past 790 years. Not only will the moon be passing by at a range of just under 225,000 miles but it will also be full.

Richard Nolle, certified professional astronomer and webmaster of astropro.com, is warning the masses that beginning on May 5 and continuing through May 11 there will be a SuperMoon risk window for the entire planet.

Nolle warns that during the SuperMoon risk window the world should expect several magnitude 5+ earthquakes, countless tsunamis, constant volcanic eruptions and werewolves to run wild. Nolle has teamed up with leading expert on the paranormal and supernatural, Rosemay Ellen Guiley in order to discover the connection between the SuperMoon and werewolves.

“Since the moon will be so close to earth, many new werewolves will come to life as the proximity of the moon to the earth affects the transformation of many werewolves,” explained Guiley, “Some werewolves never morph due to the normal distance between the earth and the moon. But the distance during this SuperMoon is of great concern.”

Twilight fans are pooping their pants with excitement over the sheer possibility that they might catch a glimpse of Jacob Black.

“Jacob is so hot!!,” said Giselle Ramirez, a teenage Hawaiian resident, “I don’t care if lava is coming right at me. If there is a chance that I can see Jacob, I’ll let my feet burn off.”

Some scientists believe that the recent volcanic eruptions in Hawaii are a result of the moon gradually passing by closer and closer leading up to the SuperMoon risk window. Nolle explains that this activity is a result of the lesser SuperMoon risk window that is currently taking place. There is grave concern for the well being of the inhabitants of Hawaii as the SuperMoon approaches. As a preventative measure, the U.S. is now initiating mandatory evacuation procedures for all of the Hawaiian Islands in order to prevent a catastrophe. A voluntary evacuation will be put into effect for southern California starting Wednesday of next week.

After you read this article you should immediately run to your closest supermarket and buy all the canned food, bottled water, batteries and silver bullets that you can get your hands on. This is going to be an apocalypse and it is a going to be a wolf dog eat wolf dog world so be prepared for the worst.

FOSTER CITY,CA – Sony throws in the towel on fixing the Playstation Network.

“I can’t handle the pressure” and “For the love of God someone please help us!” are echoed throughout the halls of Sony headquarters in Foster City.

PlayStation Network (PSN) was turned off April 20 in the wake of an “external intrusion”. No one thought that it would be the day the network died. Now almost a week later, Sony has finally called it quits.

The PSN used to offer great streaming content where users could purchase or rent movies and television programs directly from Sony as well as allowed access to streaming content from great apps including Hulu Plus, Netflix, Vudu, and Music Unlimited. Not to mention that PSN also offered a variety of online content for many popular games. But those are the days of yore.

Games like Mad Blocker Alpha were supposed to launch this week for sale on PSN but clearly that did not take place. As a result of this flub and several like it, Sony is now racking up debt and executives at Sony have decided to put the hammer down on this money pit of a problem.

“We give up! We invite anyone who thinks that they can fix this to fill out job applications for Sony and immediately FedEx them to us,” said a junior level executive who wished to remain anonymous.

Two programmers have reportedly died while trying to fix the problem. Their deaths were similar in manner to the way that the children of Korea who live, eat, and play in internet cafés often die whilst playing World of Warcraft.

“We can’t take this anymore! No one else needs to die over this,” said a junior level programmer.

Those who think that they can fix this problem should stop reading this article and immediately send their resume to Sony. To apply for a job with Sony, go to http://us.playstation.com/corporate/about/careers/ and apply. Apply to any job, it really doesn’t matter. If you have any idea that might fix this problem, they will take you. They will take whoever they can get now. They are really desperate. Just make sure to tell them that good ol’ Pierce Blodyn sent you.

OAKLAND, CA -  Teachers are using clownfish to teach children about being transgender.

Redwood Heights Elementary School, in Oakland,  is in the hot-seat after the school decided to education students about gender diversity.

On Monday and Tuesday, students of every grade were taught what the school called age-appropriate lessons about gender differences. Some lessons included all-girl geckos, a transgender clownfish, and boy snakes who act “girly” reports the San Francisco Chronicle.

“That’s a lot of variation in nature,” Gender Spectrum trainer, Joel Baum, told the students. “Evolution comes up with some pretty funny ways for animals to reproduce.”

Principal Sara Stone said the lesson on gender differences was part of a larger effort to control bullying in the school, something parents supported last year.

However, after the lessons began, several parents felt discussion in the classroom was too much.

The Pacific Justice Institute, a conservative organization, said teaching children that there may be more than two genders, “does not represent the values of the majority of families in Oakland,”

The $1,500 cost of training was funded by a grant from the California Teachers Association.

WASHINGTON, DC – The Supreme Court of the United States ordered California to release all its inmates!

In a highly contentious decision, the U.S. Supreme Court has ordered the California prison system to release all inmates in an effort to address overcrowding and the need to give inmates the freedom they have a right to have.  The total number of inmates the state will be mandated to release will fall somewhere between 237,000 and 246,000.

In a 9-4 decision, the Supreme Court upheld a 2009 ruling by a special three-judge panel; Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote the decision:

“After years of litigation, it became apparent that a remedy for the constitutional violations would not be effective absent a reduction in the prison system population,” Kennedy wrote.  “We can not take deny inmates their freedom, it’s against the Constitution.”

Critics of California’s prison system contend  that the keeping prisoners behind bars, “makes them into bad men.”   These people feel that prisoners can be monitored better in their communities, rather than behind bars.

Chief Justice John Roberts and Justice Samuel Alito agreed that keeping people behind bars is tantamount to torture.  “We should either execute a prisoner or let them go free.  It’s a waste of taxpayer money to pay for their food and lodging,” said Scalia.

Sarah Palin said that the decision was “ignoramus.”  She vowed to shoot any prisoners that got near her “little grizzlies.”

Governors of the remaining 49 states with prisons, are also considering releasing their prisoners.  “If the Supreme Court says that prisons are unconstitutional, then I will be forced to release all my prisoners,” said New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.

The Supreme Court, in a rare addendum, said that there is one exception.  One man shall remain behind bars forever:  Bernie Madoff.

LOS ANGELES, CA – a disgruntled cock fighter goes on a killing rampage.

Randy “Ruthless” Rooster is a long time contender in the sport of cock fighting. He has fought in over 125 matches, an unheard of number of battles in a sport where most only last a dozen bouts before they reach their bloody end. But recently after a long day of fighting cocks in southern California, something finally snapped in the veteran fighter sending him into a blood filled homicidal rampage.

His first victim was nearby spectator, Jose Luis Ochoa, 35, a regular to the matches who had come to the fights that day in hopes of winning big in the betting pool. Ochoa received one quick slash to his Achilles tendon, swiftly bringing him to the ground. After laying out Ochoa, Ruthless quickly went for the jugular, sealing Ochoa’s fate in a matter of seconds.

Evading capture after the gruesome murder, Ruthless continued on his violent killing spree heading south for Mexico, all along the way taking the lives of a local librarian, a school crossing guard, and a Taco Bell employee.

The National Guard was summoned to stop the ferocious fowl but in every attempt Ruthless was able to avoid capture. Not knowing what else to do, the National Guard had no other choice but to contact Interpol to get Superchicken to save the day.

Ruthless was finally apprehended by Superchicken in Los Angeles while Ruthless was attempting to attack a bus of tourists taking the famous Star Line Tours – Movie Stars’ Homes Tour. The attack took place just outside of, beef cake and former comedian, Carrot Top’s previous home where the funny looking guy was finishing packing up his things before completing his move to Canada. Lucky for Superhicken, Carrot Top was in the area as he played a key role in the capture of Ruthless.

“It was like something out of COPS except with a bunch of chickens,” said Herman Sanchez, a gardener who witnessed the capture, “like outta nowhere I see these two birds getting into it. Then in the blink of an eye, I see Carrot Top with his hands around the neck of one of the birds. That Carrot Top, he really knows how to choke the chicken.”

While being taken into custody by the LAPD, Ruthless was heard saying “bawk bawk, bawk, cock a doodle doo.” Super chicken was kind enough to translate this for us. “I had enough of the fighting. I simply couldn’t take it any more; I just cracked, like an egg.” As he was taken into the station a single tear was spotted rolling down Ruthless’s beak.

LORETO, Mexico — A pack of giant squid capsized a fishing boat in the Sea of Cortés yesterday, killing seven fishermen.

The band of sea creatures attacked the boat as it was returning to shore, creating a gruesome spectacle for late afternoon beach-goers.

“I saw four or five bodies wash up on the shore.  They were totally black and blue all over. They looked like they had been attacked by monster suction cups,” reported Timmy Irwin, a surfer visiting from San Francisco.

Witnesses say the lone survivor was barely recognizable after being dragged from the boat and chewed by several of the giant squid.

Marine biologists rushed to the scene hoping to catch at least one of the squid. Dr. Luis Santiago of the Universidad Autónoma Baja California Sur explained, “We captured one of the attackers. She is female and we believe most of the pack to be female because of their size. We also believe they coordinated the attack by using pigment cells to communicate, which is very typical in a situation like this. I’m afraid we may be seeing more of these attacks in the coming years, and possibly forever.

“Beaches in the area are closed indefinitely, and fishing boats are banned from heading out to sea until authorities can determine a squid-free safety zone.

Locals, who refer to the giant squid as “diablos rojos” – red devils, report that the legendary sea creatures have become more aggressive over the last few years. Marine biologists fear that the trend will continue because of the diminishing number of fish in their tropical hunting waters.

Many legends surround the giant squid because of their size and their gang mentality. They have eight arms and two tentacles, all covered in suction cups lined with small teeth. They also have three hearts and eyes the size of soccer balls. They hunt in groups of at least 1,000.

The giant squid can grow up to 40 feet long and 500 pounds, making them very difficult to combat. They survive so deep underwater that no light penetrates whatsoever. The pressure at that extreme level would crush any elephant or large land animal.

SACRAMENTO – Californians better prepare for doomsday because a Superstorm is on the way – and will destroy everything in its path!

Meteorologists have successfully frightened all Californians  Scientists from the U.S. Geological Survey’s (USGS) Multi Hazards Demonstration Project (MHDP) presented a document outlining the devastating effects of a massive winter storm that is heading for the state of California.

The Superstorm  will last for 40 days and dump 30 feet of water on the state, due to an “atmospheric river” that could move water “at the same rate of 90 Mississippis discharging water into the Gulf of Mexico.” Winds could reportedly reach 205 mph.

Over 100 scientists, public policy experts, and engineers are recommending that the State of California prepare for multiple emergency scenarios by shoring up already-existing infrastructure and calling in the U.S. Military to handle disaster relief. A massive earthquake drill is in the works – one that prepares authorities for 5.5 million Californians to be affected and/or displaced.

“This is going to be the most devastating storm to hit any part of the United States in the history of the United States,” said famed climatologist and government expert on natural disasters, Dr. Susan Begley.  “This Superstorm will be ten times worst than Hurricane Katrina, because it will cover a much bigger area and it will continue for days, if not weeks.”

Damage is estimated to be in the $400 billion dollar range. An estimated 1.5 million residents will have to be evacuated, and “business interruption costs” could reach $325 billion in addition to the aforementioned property costs.

“This event happens once every 100 or 200 years or so, which puts it in the same category as our big San Andreas earthquakes. This ARkStorm will have twice the strength of two historic storms (January 1969 and February 1986) put together.  “It’s the storm of the millennium,”  said Dr. Begley.

Many believe that this is Supertorm is the sign of the apocalypse.

The last time  a similar  storm struck, it covered a 300-mile stretch of the Central Valley, from 1861-1862. According to Geological Survey director Anna Pfeffer, the floods were so bad that the state capital had to be moved to San Francisco! Even larger storms are thought to have hit in the years 212, 440, 603, 1029, 1418, and 1605.

2011 will be the biggest and the deadliest year for a Superstorm – in the history of the world.

The Obama Administration is planning on issuing a warning to all California residents to prepare for the worst.  The Administration is considering ordering ALL California residents to leave the state.

Federal and state emergency management officials are gearing up for this “apocalyptic event” and will be holding a press conference with Governor Jerry Brown this weekend to talk about emergency preparations.

This may be the storm that finally be “The Big One” that makes California separate from the United States and drift off into the Pacific.

Most, media outlets are downplaying the Superstorm, so as not to cause panic.  But WWN feels it has an obligation to tell the truth to its readers and we will continue to track this deadly storm.

LOS ANGELES – Teena Marie, R.I.P.  Bat Boy loves you.

Grammy nominated singer Teena Marie — once known as Rick James protégée — died in her sleep last night at her home in Pasadena at the age of 54 .  She was also known as The Ivory Queen of Soul.

LoverGirl:

I Need Your Lovin’:

ShowBiz:

Fire & Desire  – with Rick James:

SAN DIEGO -  A San Diego angler caught the heaviest yellowfin tuna in history!

There was big celebration on the San Diego waterfront Monday morning after the vessel Vagabond returned from a long-range fishing trip into Mexican waters and offloaded the heaviest yellowfin tuna ever caught by an angler.

The behemoth, landed by Mike Livingston of Sunland, Calif., weighed 405.2 pounds; it’s girth was 61 inches and it measured nearly 86 inches from nose to tail.

The catch, made on 100-pound-test line after nearly a three-hour fight, will be submitted to the International Game Fish Assn. for approval as an all-tackle world record. Capt. Mike Lackey said IGFA rules were followed so the catch likely will replace the current record, a 388-pound 12-ounce specimen, which has stood since 1977.

“When the scale hit that number it was like the Super Bowl here,” said Livingston, 63, a retired school administrator, in reference to cheers from a crowd of nearly 200, gathered to witness the weigh-in.

The crowd was shocked when Tuna Boy (Fred Alan) showed up to the dock.  Tuna Boy was not happy about Livingston’s catch and he made everyone know it.  He chased the crowd away from the heavyweight tuna.

Unfortunately, San Diego cops used Tuna Mace and Tuna Boy had to keep away, but he vowed to return to “have a word” with Livingston.

Livingston, whose previous large tuna weighed 100 pounds, said he developed a rash while “worrying about how big this fish was going to be.”

He was so exhausted after the marathon battle that he quit fishing for the day and caught only one small tuna the remainder of the trip. Vagabond anglers caught eight tuna weighing 200-plus pounds, including two that topped 300 pounds.

The large crowd was due, in part, to reports that spread since last Tuesday via social media outlets. But also because breaking Curt Wiesenhutter’s 33-year-old world record — set on the Royal Polaris at Mexico’s now-closed Revillagigedo Islands — had been the primary objective of San Diego’s long-range fleet of deluxe sportfishers.

Here’s the official catch video: