I guess the Teleprompter Kid has nothing better to do than get mad that not everybody loves him.

NEW YORK, NY – Michelle Bachmann has come forward saying she is being stalked by left-wing TV show hosts.

In a speech at a Republican fundraising event, Jon Voight decried Barack Obama as a false prophet. He then declared himself the new savior of America.

WASHINGTON, DC – In a shocking move, John McCain supported President Obama’s Iraq troop withdrawal plan, confirming recent allegations – McCain is an alien pod person!

WASHINGTON, DC – The ever eloquent Jessica Alba called Bill O’Reilly an “a-hole” during an inaugural party, and the proud pundit is taking it to the streets.

NEW YORK, NY – Due to a great response to the future team-up between Spider-Man and President-Elect Obama, Marvel comics has decided to release a 6 issue limited series of the two fighting evil.

NEW YORK, NY – Leaving the side of Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman, PhD Ape begins preparations for a three-day seminar aimed at settling fears of the Right Wing radio and television personalities over the coming Obama Administration.