WASHINGTON – The White House has approved the redesign of U.S. currency. Barack Obama will be on the new dollar bill.

WASHINGTON, DC – Sources close to Hillary Clinton say she will announce a run for President in 2012.

WASHINGTON: President Obama is pushing a new plan to have the IRS do your taxes – tell you what you owe.

PATERSON, NJ – Chris Christie and Barack Obama have inked a deal to play Abbott & Costello in a remake of a classic film – Abbott & Costello meet Frankenstein.

WASHINGTON – The U.S. Post Office is bankrupt and will be closing for good on December 1, 2001.

WASHINGTON. BREAKING NEWS *** President Barack Obama has just resigned the Presidency of the United States!

MARTHA’S VINEYARD – President Obama has been interrupted so much on his vacation, he’s decided to extend it another week.

DALLAS – According to sources close to the Texas governor – Rick Perry fakes his twang.

NEW YORK – There’s speculation that George Soros placed heavy bets against the U.S., causing the market crash.

WASHINGTON – For the first time history the U.S. credit rating was downgraded – and the White House celebrated in style!