LOS ANGELES, CA — Authorities confirmed UFO sightings over Arizona and Southern California on Wednesday.

ALBUQUERQUE, NM – Sew another star on the flag. Mexico will become our 51st state in 2012.

ARIZONA – Steven Seagal whacked some puppies in his crimefighting reality show.

PHOENIX – The Arizona Diamondbacks signed Charlie Sheen as a reserve second baseman for the remainder of the season.

PIMA COUNTY, AZ – The U.S. Department of Interior has released a Chupacabra into Arizona in an attempt to get them to repeal their new immigration law.

SALT LAKE CITY – Utah has decided to legalize polygamy for all its citizens.

PHOENIX – A large dust storm has buried Phoenix!

PHOENIX – Arizona has purchased 20,000 Martin Jetpacks to patrol the Mexican border.

EXCLUSIVE – Sarah Palin told WWN’s Frank Lake that she is running for President in 2012!

HUALAPAI INDIAN RESERVATION, AZ — Swiss adventurer Yves Rossy has completed a flight over the Grand Canyon.