Greetings Sentients! Once again this is your most humble host and educator of all things epicurean MYGAR.

CHANDLER, AZ – Have you ever had a prank go wrong? Have you wondered how bad it could really be? This man found out the hard way.

NEW YORK, NY – No doubt that most in America have heard of the NCAA tournament, if not gotten involved in an office pool, online contest, or friendly wager.

PHOENIX, AZ – Charles Barkley was spotted on another law-breaking ride, with a familiar passenger in tow!

PHOENIX, AZ – After losing the 2008 presidential election by nearly 200 electoral votes and nearly six percent of the popular vote, Senator John McCain is understandably in very low spirits.

PHOENIX, AZ – With his presidential bid seen as lost, John McCain is putting a Flux Capacitor on the Straight Talk Express. It appears that the GOP is resorting to time travel to secure the election.

SVALBARD, NORWAY – Reports have emerged claiming that Cindy McCain, wife of Republican Presidential nominee John McCain, will return to her ice kingdom following the November elections should her husband not be victorious.

SAFFORD, AZ. – A fugitive’s abduction by aliens has prompted a hasty interstellar extradition treaty, now under review by the U.S. Senate.

At age 13, the mysterious Bat Boy’s hormones are apparently kicking in — he’s developed a crush on Senator John McCain’s daughter Meghan!

Ms. McCain’s security team say the half-human, half-bat mutant has made repeated attempts to see the young beauty — and whined “like a sad dog” when he was shooed away!