JUNEAU, ALASKA – Sarah Palin is a robot and she/it malfunctioned during her new reality show!
After Sarah Palin short circuited on the set of her new TV show, TLC officials are confirming that the popular Tea Party politician and Republican Presidential hopeful is actually a robot!
Network executives are may have to push back the last six episodes of Sarah Palin’s Alaska after its star suffered a serious software malfunction during filming.
“At first I thought she was just being weird Sarah Palin again,” said Andy Masterson, a cameraman for Sarah Palin’s Alaska, “but then I noticed smoke was coming out of her ears and her eyeballs were dangling out of her head. That’s when I knew something was wrong.”
Several Republican leaders have now come forth with admissions that Sarah Palin is indeed a robot, designed and programmed by the Microsoft Corporation to win the presidential election in 2012.
“The Republican Party apologizes to the TLC network for any harm that might have been caused by the Palin-bot” said Republican House minority leader John Boehner. “To be honest, we had no idea what we were doing when we built her. We just wanted something pretty around the office.”
According to first hand accounts, the malfunction was caused when Rob Rigelson, a tech assistant on Sarah Palin’s Alaska, accidentally inserted his cell-phone’s memory card into Sarah Palin’s central processing center, which happens to be in her butt.
“Oh man, this is all my fault,” said Rigelson. “I was just trying to download naked TSA scans of my ex-girlfriend and my SD card ran out of memory. There was an extra microchip laying around in Sarah Palin’s dressing room, so I swiped it. I didn’t know it was her artificial brain!”
When it came time to film one of Sarah Palin’s scenes, the set technicians accidentally put Rigelson’s chip into Palin’s butt. That’s when the short circuit occurred.
TLC executives then had to call Bill Gates, the head of Microsoft and chief programmer of the Palin-bot, to fly up to Alaska and “fix the problem.” Weekly World News photographers were there to capture the moment:
This is not the first time the Palin-bot has short-circuited in public. Republican officials have recently admitted that several of Palin’s embarrassing moments, including her prank phone call from Nicolas Sarkozy and her “I can see Russia from my house” comment were actually the results of software malfunctions.
I can see Alaska from my house video:
Nicolas Sarkozy prank call video: