DUBLIN – Amid a growing financial crisis, Ireland’s Prime Minister has asked the U.S. to make Ireland the 51st state.
Ireland is in the midst of a major financial crisis that is causing panic on global stock markets. Many think that Ireland, like Greece, will ask the EU to bail them out.
But WWN has learned that Ireland has had it with the European Union and has made a request to the Obama Administration to fast-track Ireland and it’s application for U.S. statehood.
Ireland would be the first state added to the United States since Hawaii became a state on August 21, 1959. The Obama Administration and Congress are putting the Irish request at the top of the lame-duck agenda. “I think we can get it done,” said President Obama, who is of Irish ancestry.
Ireland is on the brink of insolvency, which has helped drive down the S&P 500 stock index by nearly 4 percent over the last few days.
Ireland has one huge problem that has caused it to consider becoming an American state: a failed banking sector that Ireland’s government can no longer rescue on its own.
Ireland is in the midst of a real estate bust that could trump even the ruinous downturns that turned parts of southern California and Nevada into suburban ghost towns, with home-grown banks stoking it all. Now, those banks are trying to manage catastrophic losses. The Irish government has effectively nationalized the nation’s biggest banks by guaranteeing their debt, which would be akin to the U.S. government taking over Citigroup, Bank of America, J.P. Morgan Chase and Wells Fargo.
“If the Irish banks go down, the Irish government also goes down,” says economist Jacob Kirkegaard of the Peterson Institute for International Economics. “They have no choice but to ask either the EU or America for help. Most Irish citizens would rather become part of the U.S. than be beholden to the E.U.”
Americans are keen on the idea of having Dublin (and the Temple Bar) part of the United States,
But the U.S. has already announced that the practice of kissing the Blarney Stone will be banned. “It’s not sanitary and it’s too dangerous. That practice will stop. Also, the rock will be renamed The Barney Frank Stone.”
Irish women are already getting excited about being part of the U.S.A and American men are thrilled to have new “talent” in the country.
St. Patrick WILL be driving the snakes out the America, before Ireland becomes the 51st state. Naturally, many politicians are worried.
Leprechauns will be protected by the Civil Rights Act and they have already been assured that they will get at least one casino – in Chicago.
The U.S. wants Northern Ireland in the deal. British Prime Minister David Cameron is willing to give up Northern Ireland – “as long as the money is right.”
Irish Prime Minister, who will become the first Governor of the State of Ireland, is thrilled to be putting the deal together. “I don’t see any reason why this can’t get this done by the end of the year.” He does have one request: “we’re gonna have to do something about American beer. That’s a dealbreaker.”
Ed Anger is NOT happy about this news. “I’m madder than a leprechaun with a rubber shillelagh. I don’t want those boozed-up, potato eaters in my country!” Read Ed Anger’s full thoughts on the Irish…
Too late, Ed. Ireland has a new chant: “U.S.A., U.S.A., U.S.A.” Are YOU excited?