Does tear gas cause global warming? They better look into that at the big weather meeting, because they’re sure using a lot of it on the protesters!

I didn’t even think Europe had cops, let alone tear gas. They don’t have guns or the electric chair, so they don’t have any crime, right?

Anyway, what those protesters are mad about this time? Don’t they WANT to tear down factories and build windmills and grow tofu and all that crap?

If they’re mad about the big shots at the conference flying there in private jets and drinking imported booze, then for once I’m on the side of the hippies! Al Gore and his fat foreign friends are a bunch of liars and hypocrites!

Even the Commie Chinks think so! They keep saying they’re gonna walk out and not sign the big agreement. Who would ever believe old Ed Anger would be siding with Chairman Ding Dang Dong or whatever his name is?

And who thought it was smart to have this meeting in the country that invented that crappy furniture you can never put together? I bet that same company put on this meeting, because I hear the whole thing is so mixed up that half the people were stuck waiting outside in the cold for six hours!

Yes, I said cold! It’s snowing like crazy in Finland or wherever the hell they are! Isn’t that country already full of windmills? So how come it’s still cold there? No one can answer me these basic science questions.

I’m telling you: sometimes I think we should’ve let Hitler and Mussolini keep those stupid foreign countries they took over. At least they wouldn’t have put up with Al Gore, let alone a bunch of dirty hippies!