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MANIGATOR TERRORISES MACY’S DAY PARADE


NEW YORK, NY – Macy’s 150th annual Thanksgiving Day Parade drew thousands to New York City yesterday including one unwelcome guest, Manigator.

As members of the Betty Page High School marching band of Amarillo, Texas passed by 58th street, the trumpet section was accosted by a half-man half-alligator coming out of a sewer drain.  At 9:13 am Manigator was clearly drunk, and screaming about the noise upsetting his headache. 

The parade was stalled for seven minutes while police corralled the drunken mutant back into a storm drain. 

Later in the morning the world famous Rockettes took to the main stage on 34th street in preparation for their live televised performance.  Shortly after beginning their signature kickline, Manigator appeared seemingly from nowhere disrupting the routine. 

Spilling a can of cheap beer and slurring his speech, Manigator made passes at several of the “Pretty Ladies!” who scattered from the inebriated mutant.  Cameras deftly avoided the fiasco, filming only the performers who were able to continue the routine.  Eventually one of the disgruntled dancers, angry at losing her face time on nation television, high kicked the lurid hybrid back to the sewer, receiving much applause from the crowd.

No injuries were reported from the incident.  Manigator is wanted by police for disturbing the peace and attempted voter fraud in south Florida.