VANCOUVER, CANADA – Researchers are combing the wilds of British Columbia in response to recent sightings of Bigfoot with a pointy-eared boy!
More than two dozen people claim to have seen the mutant youngster scurrying along beside the towering man-beast. Investigators speculate that the mystery boy may in fact be Bat Boy, finding comfort in a fellow cryptid after years of human persecution.
“This is the most tantalizing development in Bigfoot research to take place in decades,” said Dr. Ron Coplan, a zoologist involved in the hunt for the elusive forest creature. “It suggests that Bigfoot is not some shambling monster as he is often depicted, but a gentle and intelligent being capable of nurturing behavior and compassion.”
The boy companion was first spotted in late July by truck driver Arthur Gosten who was camping in the Rockies with his family.
“I woke one morning to find this weird kid in jean shorts slinking off into the trees with an armful of our canned goods,” revealed Gosten.
Shouting after the child, Mr. Gosten gave chase and caught up with him at the edge of a clearing. “I couldn’t believe my eyes. The boy was standing next to a big hairy man-like creature,” Gosten said.
“The thing took the boy’s loot, then they ambled off together into the woods, one walking with an ape-like stride, the other skipping and catching mosquitoes in his mouth.”
Since that sighting, at least 33 people have reported seeing the pointy-eared boy and his hairy companion. The pattern of the sightings indicates that the pair may be heading towards the Okanagan Amusements Family Fun Park in southern British Columbia.
A representative at the park said they would be happy to accomodate and let the alleged Bat Boy enjoy the rides, but “only at night. You know how kids are around folks who are, well, different…”