HOLLYWOOD, CA – Jam band Phish has reunited for a heavily anticipated 2009 tour. But fans are outraged after Ticketmaster made a mistake with ticket sales.
Although never having received much radio play or TV coverage, Phish has developed a fervent following. After playing together for over 20 years, the band has spent the last four years on an extended hiatus. However, they are returning to play a four-night stand at Colorado’s outdoors Red Rocks Ampitheatre.
While the on-sale date was set for March 26, some fans noticed Ticketmaster had put them on sale a week early and quickly snapped them up. But the following morning, the ticket company informed them it had been a “glitch” and canceled the orders.
Now some of these fans were shut out yesterday and they are furious. Hippies have surrounded the Ticketmaster headquarters in West Hollywood and are beginning to riot.
“We are dedicated phans!” exclaimed Trent Nickles, or ‘DreadyBoy’ to his friends. “Man, I skipped out on my Intro to Philosophy class to buy these tickets, and I got majorly screwed. Uncool, Ticketmaster!”
The rioters seem to be causing minimal damage, pelting the building with hackey sacks, socialist newspapers and organic apples. Fans are taunting the police with shouts of, “Come on, pokey! Police brutality!” However, cops are merely standing by until the mob inevitably loses motivation and disperses to discuss how quantum physics means we are all One.