MALIBU, CA – Shocking the world today, Barbie and Ken have split up. In a press conference, Ken said it’s because of the tattoos.
One of the world’s most recognizable couples, Barbie and Ken, have been together since 1961. After years of criticism, being called just another one of Barbie’s accessories, Ken has finally taken a stand. Uncharacteristic of his image as an emasculated boyfriend, Ken has given Barbie her walking papers.
At a press conference held this morning Ken confirmed that the couple has split up, and that it had to do with her recent tattoos.
“I just can’t believe the kind of girl she’s become,” said a teary-eyed and impeccably dressed Ken. He explained his hurt that she did not talk to him first before receiving the tattoos, and his disappointment in her lifestyle choices. “We’re not that kind of people. I thought we were role models.” Becoming emotional he leaned on his friend Brad, who wore a sweater-vest and khaki ensemble matching Ken’s but in a different color scheme.
Some are questioning what Ken will do now since Barbie was clearly the breadwinner of the family. Over the years he has had over 40 different occupations. His publicist says they are currently in talks with producers about a possible reality show.
Barbie could not be reached for comment as she was making final decisions on her Totally Stylin’ Ink, Poor Choices with Sorority Sisters, and Russian Mafia tattoo playsets.