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FRYSCRAPER ATTACKS!

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A  new London skyscraper, nicknamed the Fryscraper, is melting cars, stores and… people!

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The Fryscraper purposely reflects light, which melts anything that comes in it’s path.  Many Londoners believe that the Frayscraper has a mind of its own and targets certain people and objects.

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Martin Lindsay parked his Jaguar on Eastcheap, in the City of London, on Thursday afternoon.

When he returned about two hours later, his car had melted.

The 37-story skyscraper at 20 Fenchurch Street, which has been nicknamed the “Walkie-Talkie” because of its shape, is currently under construction, but workers say that they feel that the building is “alive.”

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“The building is doing things on its own.  None of my workers want to go near it anymore,” said Ian Williams, the building project manager.

The developers London Securities and Candle Wharf said: “We are aware of concerns regarding the light reflecting from 20 Fenchurch Street and are looking into the matter.  We do not believe that the building is ‘alive’, that is just ludicrous.”
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But employees for London Securities have all gotten ill recently and most have quit working for the firm.  “The Fryscraper has taken over our lives. We don’t want anything to do with it.  It’s the devil,”  a former employee told WWN.
Look what it did to this car:
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The building really hates ice cream trucks:

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Scotland Yard is investigating the building, searching for clue to its “evilness”

“We are not afraid of a building,” said Marcus Miller of Scotland Yard.  “We will blow it to bits if we have to.”

Marcus Miller has not been seen for a week now.

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