BERLIN — These thieves really have sticky fingers. Yummy sticky fingers
Police said Monday an unknown number of culprits made off with 15 tons of Nutella chocolate-hazelnut spread from a warehouse in the central German town of Bad Hersfeld over the weekend.
The gooey loot is worth an estimated $200,000. But many insiders say that the joy of eating Nutella is actually — priceless. Nutella on the black market can go for as much as $100 per jar.
There have been a large number of Nutella robberies in the last few months because the company has fallen behind in its production schedule due to a massive increase in demand. Supermarkets report that Nutella is being stolen at an alarming rate. But no theft was anywhere near as large as this 15 ton heist.
Here’s one suspect:
But there are many, many suspects as young people across the world are eating Nutella as much as ten times a day.
People are becoming addicted to Nutella. Some are speculating that the company is putting drugs in Nutella to make people addicted. There are even rumors of people injected Nutella right into their veins.
Germans are blaming the Italians for stealing the Nutella. “Italians are born theives,” said one top German official. “I’m sure we will find all of our stolen Nutella in Italy.”
Some are speculating that a war between Germany and Italy may start because of Nutella.
Please, if you are offered any black market Nutella, don’t eat it. Send it to Weekly World News and we will get it to the proper authorities.
How does a puny $20,000 heist (about the cost of a single auto) in Germany make world news? On the heels of reports of university students stealing the product from cafeterias (also weirdly overblown in the media), something tells me that this Italian company is engaging in viral media — the idea being that it is so great people are stealing it. Would the Italians file false police reports in Germany? Something to consider, especially if this sort of viral marketing continues next month. Note to Nutella marketing (outsourced) staff: be more creative, this isn't going to work, we are onto you.
PS — And why do all the reports actually have pictures of the Nutella jars, just like an ad? Do they think we are naive? It is awfully blatant. Also, why all the recommends for a simple article with no real content? The same marketers sitting around clicking the recommend buttons. How ridiculous. I hope you get tendonitis for your BS efforts.
I can believe the article, but fred is obviously fake.