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LINDSAY LOHAN TO GIVE BIRTH TO NEANDERTHAL

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Scientists were searching for a woman willing to give birth to a Neanderthal child.  Lindsay Lohan  has volunteered.

Scientists wanted a  woman to offer her body as a way to test the abilities of modern science to clone a caveman.

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American geneticist George Templar said that he was  ready to clone a Neanderthal, but he needed a woman for the project, who could bear and deliver the unusual baby.

Lindsay Lohan read about the idea and said she would do it.  Templar was ecstatic that she wanted to take a change.  Then, Lohan’s agent demanded seven figures for using her body – and the scientists agreed to pay her.

So, Lindsay Lohan will be the mother of a neanderthal.

Some think the Lohan Neanderthal will look like this:

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Others think the baby will look more like this:

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Lohan will receive an embryo with the Neanderthal DNA,  placed in stem cells. Templar told WWN that the actual birth would be significantly different from what women usually experience. The birth canals of Neanderthal mothers were significantly wider than those of modern women, so their babies did not have to turn to get in the canals. In addition, the head of the Neanderthal baby is expected to be larger than that of normal children.

But Lohan, feels that she is “big” enough to have the baby.

It’s a risk, but one Lohan is willing to take in order to keep her fame and – dwindling fortune.

“If it works out – ok, if it doesn’t –  and it’s disgusting – well, at least I’ll have money and will keep my name in the press.”

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Templar said that this could be the greatest scientific expert ever done. “We may see the creature – I do not even want to call it a human being – that will have a poorly developed left part of the brain. It will understand that it was born in this society, to this mother, Lindsay.”

If medics find abnormalities in the fetus of a woman, they will recommend that Lindsay terminate the pregnancy.   But Lindsay will still get her millions.  So, she’s “good” either way.

The Lohan Neanderthal is expected to make its debut in January 2014.