WWN can confirm that the Mayan apocalypse was stopped by Bat Boy, who risked his own life to save Earth!
Mayan prophecy predicted the world would end on December 21, 2012. And on the morning of December 21st, all signs pointed to the destruction of a large portion of the planet. President Obama was safely hidden in the U.S. Apocalypse Bunker and NASA was doing everything it could to try to stop the inevitable.
Now that we’ve made it through the Mayan apocalypse, the scientific community is trying to determine exactly how we survived. WWN has learned that the official reason why the planet was saved. Bat Boy came to the rescue.
WWN always knew Bat Boy was special, but when we met with one of the leading scientists and “end-of-the-world” expert, Dr. Robert Zimkowski of NASA, even we were surprised at how amazing this mutant is.
How did he do it? Well, according to Dr. Zimkowski, NASA launched a rocket two months ago and it only had four being on it. Three astronauts (two Americans and a Russian) and Bat Boy. They rocket headed toward Nibiru, the planet that was hurtling toward Earth. The Mayans had predicted the end-of-the-world, but they didn’t say how exactly it would end. NASA knew all along that Nibiru would collide with Earth, thus destroying all of it.
So, the spaceship, affectionately known as Mutant 1, headed toward Nibiru. The ship got as close as it could to Nibiru and then it launched a pod with Bat Boy in it. Bat Boy, being half-bat, was the logical choice, because he could survive in the pod far longer than the other three astronauts. Bat Boy then took the Pod close to Nibiru and fired a nuclear missile at it. It was a suicide mission and Bat Boy knew it – but he wanted to save Earth. The missile hit Nibiru in the precise spot NASA wanted and the planet broke into smithereens – with the fallout heading toward Venus, and away from Earth and our Moon.
Bat Boy then safely steered the pod back to Mutant 1 and… the rest is now history. When the missile hit, the cheers from NASA personnel could be heard for miles. NASA is hailing Bat Boy as the greatest astronaut that has ever lived. President Obama will be hosting Bat Boy in Hawaii over Christmas and New Year’s and then he will invite Bat Boy to the White House to receive the Medal of Honor.
The full story of how Bat Boy saved Earth, will be released by WWN in March 2013. “The Bin Laden killing was a major historical event, but Bat Boy saving the planet from Armageddon could well be one of the greatest events in human (and bat) history.