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BIGFOOT HAS THREE WIVES


Scientists studying Bigfoot discovered that he has three fully human wives.

Bigfoot is not only real and living among us, but he is married to three lovely women (pictured below).

Bigfoot reportedly “married” the women in the last fifteen years and the women are reportedly very happy especially “in the bedroom,” according to Wendy Goodman, Bigfoot’s first wife.

This revelation about Bigfoot’s relationship status comes just days after scientists revealed that Bigfoot is a direct relative of man and had sex with human females 15,000 years ago – according to a new scientific study using ‘real’ DNA samples.

“Bigfoot has been having sex with women for a long time,” said Dr. Robert Blanton, a Bigfoot expert.   “And there have probably been thousands of women that have slept with, and married,  Bigfoot and his ancestors.”

Veterinarians say that having sex with a Sasquatch is safe and they say that if any woman fall sin love with a Sasquatch, they should not be worried about copulating with the beast.

“There is nothing wrong with making love with Bigfoot,” Dr. Blanton said.

How did the team definitively determine that Bigfoot was married?

“We suspected that Bigfoot had wives because we found some domestic huts in the woods, that suggested so,” Dr. Blanton told WWN.  “So we posted a question on Twitter looking for women (or men) who have had sex with Bigfoot and one of the wives came forward.  And so we went an interviewed all three.”

Does that mean there are little baby Bigfoots out there?

“We believe there are,” said Dr. Blanton.

Genetically, the Sasquatch are a human hybrid with unambiguously modern human maternal ancestry. Government at all levels must recognize them as an indigenous people and immediately protect their human and Constitutional rights against those who would see in their physical and cultural differences a ‘license’ to hunt, trap, or kill them.’