BOURNEMOUTH, UK - Blue goo from alien spaceships has been dropping on English citizens over the last week.
Blue spheres of blue goo have been falling from the sky over England. British authorities called in the U.N. Panel on Extraterrestrials to examine the goo and they have confirmed that the goo is from alien spaceships from Planet Gootan.
“Our scientists and extraterrestrial experts confirmed that the goo is from Planet Gootan. It is harmless, but it is clearly a warming sign from the Gootans, who first landed on our planet on November 27, 2012,” said Dr. Susan Begley of the U.N. Panel.
The blue goo is contained in 15 inch sphere balls. The goo began falling on England last Thursday and has continued falling.
Paul Bernbee from Bournemouth found about a dozen of the balls in his garden. “They’re difficult to pick up, I had to get a spoon and flick them into a jam jar,” said Bernbee.
The the jelly-like substance was “not meteorological” and could not be identified by any geologists or scientists in England, so they called in the United Nations.
Mr. Bernbee, a former aircraft engineer, said: “The sky went a really dark yellow color before the goo began to fall and then… it was everywhere.”
“As I walked outside to go to the garage there was an instant hail storm for a few seconds and I thought, ‘what’s that goo in the grass’?”
Bernbee refused to give his goo balls to the U.N. and plans on keeping the balls in his fridge in case “something cool happens to them.”
Sally Nixon of Dexter said that she was gardening when she was hit by three goo balls. “They knocked me to the ground and I was covered in icky stuff,” said Nixon. “It was gross.”
Nixon said that the spheres containing the goo have an exterior shell with a softer inner but have no smell, aren’t sticky and do not melt.”
Dr. Begley offered no explanation as to why the Gootans may be dropping goo but told WWN that the goo may be intended for the aliens from Planet Zeeba that have been spotted in England. “The Zeebans have come to earth to help humans fight against The Gootans. We know that this goo is harmless to humans, but it is deadly to Zeebans.”
So, if you are in England… mind the goo!