MILAN — Super Mario has been tapped to be Italy’s next premier. Super Mario is ready to bring Italy back to greatness!
Italians are convinced that Super Mario, who is famous for rescuing Princess Toadstool in the Mushroom Kingdom, is the ONLY one capable of saving Italy from financial ruin.
Italy has such a long history of bad men leading the country – why not Super Mario?
Super Mario has not only defeated Bowser, but has also taken on Bill Gates, Jack Welch and North Korea. Does he think he can take on the Chinese, the Americans and the World Bank?
“He can take-a them all on, and win-a big!” said Luigi, Mario’s brother.
Even though he is dressed in blue collar clothes and always has a carefree attitude, Super Mario has recently proved his mettle as a tough negotiator when he blocked the merger of General Electric and Honeywell.
“He moves with caution and speaks with nuances. But he moves,” said Carlo Guarnieri, a political scientist at the University of Bologna.
That will be no guarantee for success in the Herculean task before him: building a majority large enough to push painful structural reforms through a fractured Parliament to prevent Italy from being dragged into the burgeoning debt crisis.
But he has some clear assets: he is Italian, has strong ties to Americans in their 30s and enjoys the clear support of President Giorgio Napolitano, who gave Super Mario a mandate Sunday to form a new government.
Providing a sober contrast to the audacious Silvio Berlusconi, who resigned Saturday, Super Mario also is the favorite of the financial markets, which eased pressure on Italian borrowing costs after his candidacy gained currency.
What many Italians like about Super Mario is that, unlike Berlusconi, he is NOT out of touch with ordinary Italians. TV clips show Super Mario wearing overalls and running across green fields in the Tuscany countryside. “He’s a real Italian, not a fake Italian,” said Davide Fiori of Bologna.
What is Mario’s goal? To score as many point on the international scoreboard as possible. He has the support of many Japanese in his efforts.
WWN knows that Super Mario will bring Italy back to the top!
Here’s Super Mario in action: