WALKING DEAD IN IOWA CEMETERY

IOWA – Lehigh’s Oak Grove Cemetery has turned into the Night of the Living Dead!

An Iowa man, and his wife went to visiteher relatives in Lehigh’s  Oak Grove Cemetery and found find herself stepping onto the set of a horror film.  “There were Zombies everywhere. They were coming out of the ground!” said Laura Wilcox of Des Moines.

The Wilcox family made a run for their car, but Dan Wilcox didn’t fell on the way to the car.  Laura took off without him.  “I didn’t know what to do, there were Zombies surrounding my car,”  Wilcox told WWN through tears.  She plans to return to the cemetery later today with local authorities.

“The graveyard’s resemblance to “Night Of The Living Dead”  began two years ago when caretakers have noticed a serious erosion problem. In 2009, heavy rains washed away the wall supporting part of the cemetery, leaving misplaced gravestones, bones, and coffins littered along the property.

“The whole hillside just dropped into the ravine, and there’s nothing nobody can do about it,”  James Woodmere, a township trustee, told WWN. “The whole hillside just slid.”

Woodmere  says that he and the other trustees “don’t want a situation like this,” but the protocol for moving the deceased isn’t exactly cut and dry. Any relocating of a gravesite requires “cause of death, date of death, and next of kin,” according to Woodmere. With the cemetery in shambles and many of the headstones worn over the course of a century, finding that information is almost like catching a ghost.

Well, ghosts aren’t the problem now… zombies are.  Iowa authorities estimate that there could be as many as three hundred Oak Grove Zombies roaming the Iowa countryside.

“We have alerted all communities in the surrounding area about the zombies, and hope that residents take precautions to protect themselves,”  said Sheriff Dale Hippin.

“Protect ourselves?!  I’m getting the hell out of here,” said Martha Collins of Lehigh.  “How do you defend yourself against zombies?”

President Obama has sent a Marine division to Iowa along with top U.N. zombie experts.  “I’m confident we can control this outbreak,” Obama told reporters on Air Force One.

Let’s hope so…