SAVANNAH, GA – Zombie experts from across the world are predicting an uprising of Zombies in May of next year.
Zombie researchers at the University of Georgia, Princeton University and the University of Notre Dame wrote a paper entitled, “The Zombie Revolution” early this year and presented to the U.N. Panel on Zombies just a few weeks ago.
In the paper the top Zombie researchers in the country say that the climate, the economic downturn, rise of digital technology and the “dumbing down” of society are all contributing to an unrest among Zombies.
The unrest has been building for ten years. Many experts from many different organizations, including the CDC, have already predicted a Zombie Apocalypse, but researchers say that it will be more of an “uprising” or “revolution”.
“Zombies want to overturn the current way of life in America,” said Professor Joseph Bunstrov of Princeton University. “Zombies see a decline in ethics, morals, and a general decline in “common sense.” In the past, when Zombies have risen up – most notably in the 1936 and 1974 – they have tried to stir the general population into some sort of action to reverse a particular cultural course in America.”
Bunstrov went on to say that the Zombie Revolution predicted for 2012 has the potential to be ten times as large as any in the past. “No community in America will be spared,” Bunstrov warned. “Zombies have become more sophisticated over the years. They are now capable of taking advantage of technology – thought they strongly oppose it. Zombies have better communication between the different Zombie Tribes. It will be a massive revolution.”
So what cities do researchers predict will affected the most?
“It’s hard to say right now,” said Bunstrov. “In a few months we will have a clearer picture. Washington DC seems to be a city we mentioned frequently in the communications we have intercepted recently. But for some odd reason, Buffalo, New York is also mentioned – as is Austin, Texas.”
There are multiple militia groups forming to prepare to fight the Zombies next May. “We gotta be prepared for these monsters,” said Dale Carson of Grand Rapids, MI. “Zombies will not get me and my family. You can bet on that.”
We sure do hope so, Dale.
WWN will be following this story closely. In the meantime, here’s a helpful video: