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INVISIBLE SHARKS ATTACK JERSEY SHORE!


ATLANTIC CITY – Invisible sharks are terrorizing beachgoers on the Jersey shore.

50 different shark species, or more than 10 percent of all known sharks, are luminous – invisible. This means they can produce and emit light from their bodies.

For some reason, many of these sharks have been prowling the shores of New Jersey.  And they’ve attacked over 276  beachgoers.  Many have lost arms, legs and, a few have lost their heads.

These vicious invisible sharks are completely invisible to the human eye.

Can you see the Great White Shark in this picture?:

And look at this poor  Jersey girl.  Can you see the big shark chewing on her torso?

The invisible sharks are nicknamed “the phantom hunter of the fjords”: the velvet belly lantern shark.

Jersey beachgoers have a different name for them:  “dinner.”  As Vinny Companelli said, “I want all those invisible things dead.  Dead!”

Even Snooki was almost attacked.  A small invisible shark leaped out of the ocean and almost bit her.  Luckily, there were some goombah’s there to save her.

Like most sharks, the mouth of the invisible sharks are on its underside, so the camouflage system allows the sharks to grab prey, such as krill and pearlfish, with invisible ease.

Similar to how lipstick makes a woman’s lips stand out more, the shark’s light may also turn on members of the opposite sex.

Great.  Just want New Jersey needs – horny  sharks.  Don’t they have enough?