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WEINER INKS DEAL WITH VIAGRA


NEW YORK – Embattled Congressman Anthony Weiner has signed a deal to be the new spokesman for Viagra.

Anthony Weiner is finally giving in – having realized his days as a Congressman are coming to a close and that he will never be Mayor of New York City.  All because of a the “junk shot seen round the world.”

After a long night of briefings with his staff, Weiner has decided to capitalize on his crotch close-up – “turn it into a real money shot.”

“I can say with certitude that this has had a negative effect on my family and my job, the one New Yorkers thought they sent me here to do.  I must look to the future.  And that future is… Viagra.”

Weiner was quick to point out that he has never used Viagra in the past.  “I do not have ED and I have been told I am  a  – stud-monster.  Ask my 21-year-old friends.  They haven’t seen one picture of me in which I wasn’t erect.”

Weiner will be no longer be talking about the National Debt, Jobs or the War in Afghanistan.  He will be talking about “when the moment is right” for Viagra.

He turned down Cialis  and Levitra because – “who needs an erection to last more than four hours?” – even though his photo erection has lasted over a week now.

Weiner said that Viagra isn’t just for Erectile Dysfunction.  “Viagra also helps blood flow in the body, which includes blood flow in the brain.  I think I could use a little help in that department.”

“I take Viagra.  Not for my penis, but for my brain.”

Maybe they are one in the same…

WWN’s Elsa Akesson had previously reported on Brett Favre’s deal with Viagra and Cialis.