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KIM JONG IL IS ALIVE!

ATHENS, GA – Kim Jong Il has been sighted at a record store in Athens, Georgia.

North Korea’s formerly deceased communist dictator was seen perusing used records at Wuxtry, the same store where the band R.E.M. was formed

Notably absent from the public eye for months, Kim Jong Il has been recently been spotted in small towns throughout the American heartland. North Korean officials deny these claims, sating “Preposterous! Our Glorious Leader is dead, working tirelessly for the people from the afterlife.”

Here he is relaxing in his Georgia apartment:

Although attempting to blend in, Kim Jong Il attracted unwanted attention when he began happily singing along to Dave Matthews’ “Under the Table and Dreaming” at a listening station.

After nearly two hours of careful consideration he left the store with albums by Tom Waits, Neutral Milk Hotel, and Johnny Cash on vinyl. Before leaving he picked up a flier for a house party at the nearby University of Georgia. Investigation has yet to conclude whether the communist leader attended the kegger.

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14 thoughts on “KIM JONG IL IS ALIVE!”

  1. Actually, there are many male enhancement surgeons in Georgia, so let it be known: The devil went down to Georgia for a bit of "confidence-boosting". He hopes to return to North Korea as twice the man he used to be.

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  2. Doesn't he have bodyguards. Aren't we watching him. WTheck is he doing here? Singing in Montana Listening to music in a music store in Georgia and Tennesee. Wow! What balls he has ladies and gentlemen. Is he gonna buy a house here too.? Is this a joke?

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  3. wtf is he surgery prone a zombie I heard on NEWS he was dead or some wild goose chase stories where is the Georgian surgeon saying he will go next did you peeps read this thats not how to draw the line send some WWNews Reporters to HIM THROUGH that surgeon I read about that surgeon months ago.

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  4. He must have learned the same trick Elvis did. He probably got sick of taking care of North Korea and decided to think more for himself. Id like to see if he could find himself a cute coed at that kegger.

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