LEPRECHAUNS BANNED FROM ST PATRICK’S DAY PARADE

NEW YORK – A group of leprechauns were not permitted to participate in the annual St. Patrick’s Day Parade.
The St. Patrick’s Day Parade has been a New York City tradition since 1762. It is a celebration of all things Irish where those of Irish decent and those who simply like to drink flock to Fifth Ave. to catch a glimpse of drunken men parading the streets of Manhattan in kilts.
However, this year a group of eager Irish were not allowed to participate. Lenny the Leprechaun is one of about 30 odd leprechauns that were told that they could not be a part of the parade festivities.

“We don’t understand why we cannot participate in this years parade,” said Lenny, “We have been a long-standing tradition of Irish culture and heritage for several hundred years. We have the right to be recognized and participate in the parade.”
New York City Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly stated that they leprechauns were not allowed to participate in the parade for their own personal safety; citing that the struggling economy puts the leprechauns in a high risk category due to their extreme wealth. “Everyone is looking to get rich quick in New York City. We were concerned that if the leprechauns were allowed to participate that we would have an enormous amount of kidnappings on our hands,” explained Kelly.

When Lucky the spokesman for Lucky Charms Cereal was asked his opinion about the news, he was quoted as saying, “They’re magically delicious!” No one is exactly sure what he was referencing and most do not listen to him ever since he fell off the wagon.
Lenny and the other leprechauns are filling a class action lawsuit against the City of New York sighting discrimination amongst other charges. Attorney, Bernie Goldstein, who recently represented Bigfoot in a copyright and trademark infringement case, will be representing the leprechauns in this ground breaking case.