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FLYING DONKEY DEAD!


MOSCOW — A flying donkey that last year shot to international fame has been murdered!

A donkey that reportedly was forced to parasail above the beaches of southern Russia last summer has apparently died of a heart attack.

A veterinarian said the heart attack was likely the result of stress brought on by the experience, which sparked an international outcry from animal-rights activists.

But there is even more troubling information coming out of Russian.  Pravda is reporting that the donkey may not have died of a heart attack, she may have been murdered.

The female donkey named Anapka made headlines worldwide and attracted the attention of local police after beachgoers in Russia’s southern village of Golubitskaya were stunned when they saw a braying, apparently terrified donkey soaring in the blue skies over the Sea of Azov. 

The donkey was attached to a parachute pulled by a speedboat and was in the skies as a result of an impromptu advertising campaign by several entrepreneurial Russians to attract beachgoers to indulge in the thrill of parasailing. 

Some workers at the stables said they saw a mysterious man sneak into the stable at night.  They chased him out and the next day, Anapka, was dead.

“She was murdered.  I know it,” said Vlad Morskalvoich.  “Anapka had become a national cause for animal rights activists – and they didn’t want her alive anymore to champion their cause.”

The July stunt aroused a storm of protest from animal-rights activists including French actress Brigitte Bardot who wrote to President Dmitry Medvedev – who laughed at her letter and tossed it in the trash.

Anapka was old but looked healthy and was very quiet when she arrived in the stables, Yulia Dobrovolskaya, the stables’ manager, said. Soon after she began to refuse food and water.  She had a phobia for birds and the blue sky.   “Every time she looked at the sky she would collapse, it was terrible.”

The “official” autopsy shows that the famous donkey died from myocardial infarction.  Government veterinarians are blaming the entrepreneurs who tried to attract  beachgoers with the donkey stunt.

So who killed Anapka and why?  Well, WWN is on the case and will report our findings soon.  We’ve dispatched our top snoop, Chuck Bench, to Russia.

Anapka was attached to a parachute pulled by a speedboat and was in the skies to attract beachgoers to indulge in the thrill of parasailing.  Here’s the video of the event: