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OXFORD SKI TRIP


FRANCE – Oxford and Cambridge students suffered hypothermia after stripping down during a chilly trip to the Alps.

As part of a promotion to win a free vacation, the Oxbridge university students teamed up and got extra friendly with the competition.

They stripped!  They slalomed!  They froze!

So what did it take to win? Just a little slope-side nudity. Luckily, vital body parts were mostly covered in either marinara or chocolate sauce which worked to prevent any extreme hypothermia cases.

The annual multi-faceted competition pits collegiate teams against each other in a wide range of ski resort events, including the Sock It Super-G and the Salami Slalom. During the “Downhill Poach” contest, participants have to smash an egg in the most creative way possible.

The winning team from St. Anne’s College, Oxford showed their smarts and then some! Enlisting their signature move, “the fresh meringue,” they placed an egg between the “cheeks” of one team member, while another came from behind and smashed the egg with a wine bottle. They sealed the deal by sharing the egg with some buttered toast, jam, and stewed tomatoes.

Sponsors of the event pulled out after seeing photos of the the competition’s main events. Representatives of Scott Munny, Inc., a well-known English travel agency, declared, “We will honor this year’s winning team. But this is our last year sponsoring any Varsity Trip events.”

Over the last few years, the “Varsity Trip” has grown into a massive event. It is now advertised as the biggest student ski trip anywhere in the world. Over 3,000 students attended this month’s trip in the French Alps and the majority of them posed for erotic pictures on the slopes. There were also numerous reports of snowmen being molested.

The host resort advertised “the cheapest booze prices in the French Alps, it promises to be wild.”At press time, students were bathing together to get warm. None requested a refund, but many requested an HPV test.