COLORADO SPRINGS – After years of research, the United States Air Force has unveiled a top-secret air craft – the first U.S. flying saucer!
The flying saucer, which can fly at over 17 times the speed of sound and can exit the earth’s atmosphere on a single tank of fuel, is already being hailed by aerospace engineers as the fastest, most powerful aircraft in the history of manned spaceflight.
“Since the first UFO was spotted flying over American soil, the US Armed Forces have been trying to replicate the awesome powers of the flying saucer,” said Jerome Steeple, a US Air Force spokesman. “Now that power is ours.”
In its first recorded flight attempt, the flying saucer, known in the Air Force as ‘Project X,’ set a new record for the longest supersonic flight in history, flying for ten continuous minutes at a top speed of Mach 17. That’s nearly twice as fast as the previous record setter, the Boeing X-51 WaveRider, which clocked in at a mere Mach 10.
“The technology witnessed today is the culmination of twenty years of hard research,” said William Jacobi, the Air Force’s chief aerospace engineer. “We’ve envied the aliens for the aerospace technology for so long. No we have something that will rival even their best spacecrafts. Alien invasions – bring ‘em on.”
Besides its hypersonic speed and radar invisibility, the Air Force flying saucer is also equipped with dual laser cannons, satellite sensors, multiple machine gun ports, and a full fledged tractor beam.
But the new technology does not come without its fair share of controversy. When asked how the technology for the new ‘Project X’ space craft was discovered, the Air Force remained uncharacteristically tight lipped.
“Project X’s technology is top secret information,” said Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. Nathan A Schwartz. “We cannot disclose anything about where or from what galaxy we received the blueprints.”
Conspiracy theorists across the country believe that the flying saucer might be from another planet.
“That’s alien technology,” said Charles Segowski, a self-proclaimed alien hunter from Carson, Nevada. “The Air Force stole it! I just know it! This whole thing is going to back fire if we don’t give it back to them.”
The Air Force has yet to respond to allegations that their newly unveiled flying saucer was built using alien technology.
Look at the picture. Decide for yourself!