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CHILEAN MINER FALLS DOWN MANHOLE IN NYC MARATHON!


NEW YORK- Edison Pena, one the Chilean miners, fell into a manhole at mile 13 of the NYC Marathon!

Edison Pena, who set out to run the New York City Marathon on Sunday, fell into a manhole at mile 13 of the race. He is trapped in the New York City sewer system!

According to police reports, Pena fell into the manhole, which is located just outside of Long Island City, because the sewer workers forgot to replace its cover after performing routine maintenance.

“I was there to cheer Pena on,” said Carly Spiegle, a Queens resident who watched the race from her apartment in Long Island City. “I saw him rounding the corner and went to get my binoculars. All of a sudden there were people screaming and crowding around the manhole. That’s when I knew something was wrong.”

Edison Pena right before he fell in manhole

 

New York City firemen worked through the night in an effort to pull Pena from the sewer. But due to a rather large obstruction in the sewer’s main pipeline, all attempts have failed.

“There’s something big and stinky down there, and it’s getting in the way of our rescue efforts,” said Mitch Stevenson of the FDNY. “We’re just going to have to wait this one out patiently. In the meantime, we’ve been sending down food and water.”

This is not the first time Pena has had to face the soul-crushing isolation of being trapped underground. His last stint below the surface was in Chile, where he and 32 other miners were trapped 2,000 feet below ground for a record 69 days.

“I think he’s going to be just fine down there,” said Stevenson. “If Pena could survive being stuck in a Chilean mine for two months, then the New York sewer system should be a piece of cake – a piece of filthy, rat-infested cake”

“This is really a shame,” said Juan Esposito, a friend of Pena’s and fellow mine shaft survivor. “He worked so hard for this, running in place for nine hours a day. Looks like he’s right back where he started – in a poop covered whole in the ground.”

Though Pena has been trapped in the New York City sewer system for two days, he still has a chance of finishing the race ahead of Subway spokesman Jared Fogel. Mr. Fogel, who has yet to cross the finish line, was last seen jogging his fat butt down 5th Avenue while trying to scarf a $5 dollar footlong down his throat.