CHICAGO – The John D. and Catherine T MacArthur Foundation today made it official. Bat Boy is a genius.
Weekly World News is proud to announce that Bat Boy has been chosen by the MacArthur Foundation to receive one of its prestigious fellowships, also called “genius grants.”
Upon hearing the news Bat Boy took a baseball bat and smashed the offices of the MacArthur Foundation. They didn’t mind though… “he’s a genius, he can do whatever he wants.”
The recipients of the fellowship, including Bat Boy, will each receive $500,000 in “no strings attached” support over the next five years. MacArthur Fellowships come without stipulations and reporting requirements and offer Fellows unprecedented freedom and opportunity to reflect, create, and explore. The work of MacArthur Fellows knows neither boundaries nor the constraints of age, place, and endeavor.
“This group of Fellows, along with the more than 800 who have come before, reflects the tremendous breadth of creativity among us,” said MacArthur President Robert Gallucci. “They are explorers and risk takers, contributing to their fields and to society in innovative, impactful ways. They provide us all with inspiration and hope for the future.”
Gallucci spoke about choosing Bat Boy. “There hasn’t been a more active mutant in the United States – ever. Bat Boy’s recent work with Bat Boy Conservation to combat White-Nose Syndrome was what made him a unanimous choice. We all love Bat Boy.”
Stephen Hawking called Bat Boy to congratulate him. Their conversation could not be heard by any human beings, but there were a lot of enthusiastic high-pitched sounds and squeaks. “Hawking wishes he had half the mind that the half-boy does,” Hawking’s assistant, and new lover, said.
WWN is proud of Bat Boy and wish him the best during his five-year fellowship. To read more about Bat Boy’s life, buy the new authorized biography, GOING MUTANT. You can get it HERE
Here’s the Complete List of 2010 MacArthur Fellows:
The 2010 MacArthur Fellows
Amir Abo-Shaeer, Physics teacher, CA
Bat Boy, Mutant, WV
Nicholas Benson, Stone carver, RI.
Drew Berry, biomedical animator, Australia.
Michael Bolton, Singer, NV
Carlos D. Bustamante, Population Geneticist, CA
Matthew Carter, type designer, MA
David Cromer, Theater Director, NY
Shannon Lee Dawdy, Anthropologist, IL
Leonardo DiCaprio, Actor, CA.
Annette Gordon-Reed, American historian, MA
Kim Kardashian, Entrepreneur, CA
Yiyun Li,Fiction Writer, Davis, CA
Michal Lipson, Optical physicist, Ithaca, N.Y.
Lindsay Lohan, Actress, Hollywood, CA
Rachel Maddow, News anchor, NY
Nergis Mavalvala, Quantum Astrophysicist, MA
Jason Moran, Jazz Pianist and composer, NY
Sarah Palin, Grizzly Mom, AK
Sebastian Ruth, Violist, and Music Educator, RI
David Simon, author, producer and screenwriter, MD
Marla Spivak, entomologist, St. Paul, Minn.
Howard Stern, Broadcaster, NY
Elizabeth Turk, Sculptor, GA