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MAYOR CORY BOOKER TO CUT TOILET PAPER


NEWARK, NJ – Faced with tight financials, one city mayor has decided to cut an odd supply!

Mayor Cory Booker does not have a soft spot when it comes to toilet paper. The Newark mayor has threatened to stop spending city funds on toilet paper in an effort to close a $70 million budget gap. BYOTP might become the new norm for city employees.

“We’re going to stop buying everything from toilet paper to printer paper,” Booker said during a City Hall news conference in Newark Wednesday.

“Call me Mr. Scrooge, if you want, but there will be no Christmas decorations around the city,” he added.

Booker said the belt-tightening will commence on Aug. 2 with the closing of city pools and its popular Camp Watershed. Union leaders represeting the city’s 1,450 nonemergency workers scoffed at Booker’s vow to implement a TP ban.

“He wants to balance the budget on worker’s backsides,” said Rahaman Muhammad, president of the Service Employees International Union Local 617.

“Maybe Booker is gonna make people carry those little packets of tissue,” Muhammad told the Daily News. “It’s not about toilet paper; this about throwing a tantrum.”