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SHROUD OF TURIN


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ROME – An Italian research group has debunked the Shroud of Turn.  Jesus Christ responded, “Sorry guys, my bad.”

The Shroud of Turin has been a religious symbol for centuries. It was believed to be the shroud that covered Christ in the tomb, which was then imprinted with his image at the moment of resurrection. Radiocarbon dating placed the shroud in the 13th or 14th centuries, however possible exposure to pollen and smoke in that era made the tests inconclusive.

Scientists in Italy have successfully recreated the image on the famous shroud using materials and techniques that were available at the time.  The means of constructing the image was the last hurdle in debunking the authenticity of this holy relic.

Weekly World News hired a medium to channel Jesus Christ, who had this to say: “Psych!  You just got Punked!  Nah nah, I’m just kidding with you.”  Speaking through the medium, he continued, “Yeah, sorry about that.  I meant to tell you guys about that earlier.  Not mine.  Didn’t have anything to do with it.  But it is pretty cool looking right? Especially before Photoshop, wow!”

The Vatican had no official comment other than “Lets not get caught up in what we believe and what’s a provable scientific fact.  Nobody wins that game.  Lets try to focus on what is important in all of this: ‘Wouldn’t it be neat if?'”  The 700 year old relic will soon be available on Ebay.