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PLAXICO BURRESS PLEADS GUILTY


burress

UPDATE: Former football player Plaxico Burress has plead guilty to a weapon charge stemming from his leprechaun tussle last year.

It is assumed that though the leprechaun may have provoked Burress, the player was still in possession of a weapon.

Weekly World News attempted to reach Mr. O’Shaughnessy for comment, but was told he was out celebrating, getting “bollixed” on a heady mixture of Guinness and clover wine.

We will continue to report on any further developments.

December 2, 2008

NEW YORK, NY – Plaxico Burress has finally admitted who – or what – he was aiming at when he accidentally shot himself.

On Friday, November 28, Giants receiver Plaxico Burress left a New York City nightclub after accidentally shooting himself in his right thigh. Burress checked into a hospital under a pseudonym but was soon recognized by hospital staff members and the media was notified.

After taking counsel with his lawyer, Burress finally surrendered to the police on Monday, with an explanation they were not expecting: Burress was aiming at a leprechaun who had been getting fresh with his wife!

Weekly World News tracked the leprechaun down for his side of the story. Seamus O’Shaughnessy said to reporters “I dinnea lay a hand on the lass tha’ she dinnea want!  She made the first move sure as I’m standin’ here!  He asked for an apology, an’ sure enough he got it!  Not my fault if the daftie tripped over his sweatpants an nearly blew off his John Thomas.”

However before O’Shaughnessy could answer any further questions he disappeared with the reporter’s wallet and pants.