SWEDEN –  An international team of oceanic experts have found an alien ship from Planet Gootan National on the bottom of the Baltic Sea.

The ship was abandoned, but experts from the U.N. Panel of Extraterrestrials told WWN that the Gootans were using the Baltic Sea as a base to spy on humans.

The U.N. dispatched a team of experts in Unidentified Submarine Objects (USOs) to the Baltic Sea accompanied by an elite Navy SEALS team.  The U.S. military has been conducting a vast underwater reconnaissance of Gootan activities, ever since the Gootans landed three large ships on Earth in November, 2011.

Some are saying the ship looks like the Millennium Falcon from Star Wars:

Reports so far indicate that there may be another 29 Gootan ships in oceans around the globe and the number appears to be increasing daily.

“The Gootan ships have been sighted by seamen and divers worldwide and the descriptions are amazingly similar,” said Dr. Simon Michaels, a marine biologist with high-level contacts in the Pentagon.

“The undersea vessels are about 300 feet long with two saucer-shaped appendages and they are extremely fast. They are capable of reaching great depths – but can also pass from the water straight up into the atmosphere and right in out to stellar space.

“Over the past three decades, we’ve had such sightings from time to time. But the vast increase in reports over the last few months confirms that we are dealing with a major alien invasion from Planet Gootan.”

The Gootan ship in the Baltic was found by a Swedish company named Ocean Explorer.  They found the ship using their sonar technology – and immediately reported it to extraterrestrial experts at the U.N.

Rumors are swirling that Twitter is going to shut down due to the censorship rules that governments are placing on them.

Twitter has announced plans to censor Tweets according to the laws in each user’s country, which it says will allow it respect “different ideas about the contours of freedom of expression.”

Users have reacted angrily to the restrictions, which they say amount to censorship.  As a result, rumors are spreading that Twitter will shut down on May 1st.

The official Twitter blog announced the censorship rules in a post called “Tweets Still Must Flow”.  That’s when the Twitter anger exploded.  Users are not happy with this and are vowing to abandon the service.

Twitter reportedly hopes that by announcing a shut down date, it will give governments time to come up with a solution that will allow freedom to once again reign on Twitter.

Twitter cited the example of France and Germany, where pro-Nazi statements are banned. Until now, the post said, Twitter was obliged to delete content that broke those laws on a global basis, so it would not be visible anywhere – even in countries where it was legal.

Content will be blocked in response to “a valid and properly scoped request from an authorized entity,” Twitter said on its support page.

When a Tweet is censored, a notice will appear reading: “This Tweet from @Username has been withheld in: Country.” Twitter also said it would collaborate with Chilling Effects, an independent online rights monitor, to make all of its take-down notices public.

Twitter Freedom Fighters are vowing to take on ALL governments and try to keep Twitter open.

This all began with the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA), which made governments around the world believe that they can start regulating (controlling) the internet.  The Obama Administration is the strongest proponent of internet censorship.

“We believe that the President of the United States should be able to control the internet, both here and around the world,” said one White House insider.  ”The President knows what is best for all citizens on earth.”

“That’s just silly,” Twitter CEO Dick Costolo tweeted in response to the reports about Twitter shutting down, but sources close to people inside Twitter say that on May 1st, Twitter will be… done.   The Twitter King is not happy about it:

“Until governments agree to keep their hands off the internet and Twitter, we will go dark,” said a source close to someone at Twitter.

Get your last Tweets in…  at least they got their star on Hollywood Boulevard.

WASHINGTON – The White House has approved the redesign of U.S. currency.  Barack Obama will be on the new dollar bill.

The Obama Administration feels that the American dollar is in bad need of a makeover.  They have partnered with the Dollar ReDe$ign Project to pick a new design for U.S. currency.  Currently, the design that the administration likes best was done by Dowling Duncan (a British duo), which features a unique vertical design.  It also features President Obama on the one dollar bill.

“We love the Dowling Duncan look.  They’ve come up with a creative design and put President Obama where he belongs… on number 1,” said David Axelrod, Senior Adviser to President Obama.

The Dollar Redesign Project was organized by creative strategy consultant Richard Smith.  He is still soliciting ideas for the dollar bill of the future. “Our great ‘rival’, the Euro, looks so spanky in comparison it seems the only clear way to revive this global recession is to rebrand and redesign,” the project notes on its website.

Here’s the web site for  The Dollar Redesign Project.

“Don’t waste your time submitting a design, it’s a done deal,” said Rahm Emanuel, White House Chief of Staff.  The President wants “change” in the currency and we’ve unanimously picked Dowling Duncan’s work.  Fed Chairman, Benjamin Bernanke, has signed off on our choice for the redesign.  We intend to have the money in circulation by June, 2011.”

Emanuel went on to say that there are plans to redo U.S. coins as well.  “We don’t need a complete redesign of our coins, but we do want to put President Obama on the penny and move President Lincoln to the nickel. Thomas Jefferson, who was on the nickel, will be… discontinued.”  Republican  Congressman Paul Ryan suggested President Obama be  put on both the “nickel and dime” instead of the penny.

Another American icon might also be replaced.  “Uncle Sam is outdated,” said Axelrod.  “We need to update this icon as well.  It will now be Uncle Barack.”

Republicans are apoplectic about the changes the Administration is proposing.  “They won’t get this passed when we get control of the house,” said Minority Leader John Boehner.  “Typical Republicans, they want to block everything, even a little meaningless design issue,” said Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi.  “It doesn’t matter what they think, we’re going to pass this and every American will be carrying Obama dollars in their wallets and purses come June, 2012.”

FYI:  The Obama dollar will reportedly be worth $0.47.

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An asteroid will ricochet off the North Pole on Friday.   It will hit the ice and shoot back into space.

This is the first time an asteroid will bounced off earth.  Scientists say that if the thickness and composition of ice matches the composition of an asteroid, than the asteroid will ricochet back into space.

“It’s an event that happens, only once every seven hundred years,” said cosmologist Dane Wilkins.

The asteroid, estimated to be about 96ft in diameter, was first detected on Wednesday.

The space rock – named 2012 BX34 – will hit the north pole after barely missing the Moon.

Astronomers stress that there is no cause for concern.

“Nobody will be hurt, unless you are walking on the polar ice cap.  A polar bear MAY be hurt, but the chances are slim,” said Barry Willis, associate director of the US-based Minor Planet Center.

“It makes it in to the top 20 asteroid events in the history of the world,”  Willis told WWN.

The asteroid’s path makes it the closest space-rock to pass by the Earth since object 2011 MD in June 2011.

Earlier estimates had put the asteroid’s closest distance at as little as 5,000 miles, near the distance at which geostationary satellites reside, but observations by observatories overnight showed it will hit the north pole and bounce off.

Although the asteroid will not be visible to the naked eye, Dr Williams said that keen backyard astronomers could get a look.

“We’ve had three sets of observations in the last few hours from amateur observers in the UK,” he said.  ”They all confirm ‘the bounce’”.

If you are outside at 4pm EST today, you may catch a glimpse of the Asteroid Bounce.

Two porn stars plan a pole dancing battle to be mayor of Italian town Taranto.

The idea of the average mayor pole dancing would not appeal to most voters, but in the Italian town of Taranto, porn stars Amandha Fox and Luana Borgia both think it will get one of them the job.

Amandha Fox and Luana Borgia are vying to become the next civic leader of the town, and are hoping to wow voters not only with their mandates, but also with their pole dancing skills.

Here’s Amandha Fox:

Here’s Luana Borgia:

The pair have arranged a pole dancing night next month when voters can come along to hear about local election issues, although how many will turn up for a keen policy discussion is unclear because the two will also strip for the voters.

Town supervisor, Mimmo Pavese told WWN: ‘We want to be fair so we would like to invite any other candidate to come along and dance and strip, too.”

Amandha added: “I want voters to see the real me” – and judging by her previous career she means rather a lot – if not all – of her.

It’s not yet clear if the other candidates are interested in taking up the challenge, or indeed even if the town’s voters want to see their future leader in such a compromising position.

The pair could perhaps take some tips from Czech councillor Vendula Kroupova, who posted X-rated photos of herself on Facebook.

Ms Kroupova uploaded snaps of herself posing topless in ripped fishnets but maintained the images were ‘art’.

“If someone doesn’t like it they don’t have to vote for me,” she said.

The Fox and Borgia is starting a trend of porn stars seeking political office.  Maybe one will be a late entry into the 2012 Presidential election.

Newt Gingrich plans to colonize the moon in two years and it make it the 51st State, if Newt becomes President. 

Gingrich laid out this plans during a speech in the city of Cocoa, on Florida’s Space Coast. He also said that near-Earth space would be bustling with commercial activity by 2015, and that America would possess a next-generation propulsion system by then, allowing the nation to start daily flights to Mars.

Gingrich said that he wants to make the Moon our 51st State and he wants to go to the moon, personally, and plant an American flag on the moon.

“I think we are the only country in the world that can develop the Moon and make it viable.  I can see something like the Mall of America on the moon,” Gingrich reportedly told reporters.

“By the end of my second year in office, we will have the first permanent base on the moon, and it will be American and the moon will have an NFL franchise,” Gingrich reportedly said.

The former Speaker of the House made no apologies for the boldness of his ambitions, which depend primarily on the emergence of a vibrant commercial spaceflight industry.

He said the U.S space program needs a kick in the pants like the one President John F. Kennedy gave it in 1961, when he promised to put a man on the moon by the end of the decade.

“I am sick of being told we have to be timid, and I am sick of being told we have to be limited to technologies that are 50 years old,” Gingrich told a standing-room-only crowd of cheering supporters.

With the retirement of NASA’s space shuttle program last July, the U.S. is now reliant on Russia to get its astronauts to and from the International Space Station, and will be until 2017 or so, when private American vehicles may start coming online.

Meanwhile, China is ramping up its space program.

“If the Chinese try to come to the moon, we will stop them.  The moon belong to the U.S.  We were there first,” Gingrich reportedly said.

Mitt Romney said that he thinks it’s a great idea for Gingrich to go to the moon.  ”I think we should send him there right away.  The moon needs him,”  Romney reportedly said.

The miracle birth happened in Velistsikhe, Georgia.

The tiny brown and white lamb can be seen nursing from its mother and maneuvering happily around its stable home.

The lamb appears to be quite tame as it is hoisted up and around by farmer Abadzhanov Albert, who beams from ear to ear throughout a video (below).

His family are also impressed with the leggy critter, and a youngster can be seen tenderly stroking its soft fur.

Abadzhanov explained the birth had caused chatter amongst locals and his peers.

He said: ‘I have been asking the other shepherds, but none of them remember such case.

‘There were three-legged lambs, one-eyed, but not six-legged, bisexual one. The lamb eats well, but moves with difficulty.’

Genetic mutations in animals are relatively common.  Check out this cow:

And here’s a video of the little lamb:

LONDON – Just five days into her marriage with Prince William – Kate Middleton announced that she is pregnant!

Kate Middleton is pregnant with Prince William’s first child.   The announcement was made by Kate with her friend Victoria Beckham standing at her side.

Beckham reportedly encouraged Kate to have a baby as soon as possible because “it is   one of the best things in the world.”

Royal insiders believed that Kate would get pregnant within the first year of her marriage to Prince William, but everyone was surprised at how fast it happened.

“Prince William and Princess Kate spent over fifteen hours in the Royal Wedding Suite,” said Royal butler, Thomas Hillstrom.  “They spent quite a lot of time ‘enjoying’ each other’s company.”

Many in England are now speculating that Kate was pregnant at the time of the wedding, but Royal gynecologist, Dr. Fritz Barnwell, said “Kate was not pregnant last Friday, the Queen had us test her to ensure that she was without child.  But today, at Prince William’s request, we performed advanced pregnancy tests on Kate and we can confirm, decidedly, that she is five days pregnant.”

Queen Elizabeth is thrilled to learn that she will have her first great-grandchild.  Prince Charles, however, is not so happy.  “What’s the point of having a baby, when the world is about to burn up.  We must all stop using fossil fuels, we must kill all the cows, and we must plant as many trees as possible,” Prince Charles said before getting onto his private jet in Los Angeles with twenty-five members of his staff.

Princess Kate said that she and Prince William will continue to enjoy each other’s “company” in the Royal Wedding Suite, even though she has already made Her Majesty happy with her pregnancy.  “Prince William is a Royal stud. That’s all I can say.”

The happy couple has not been seen for the last ten hours – but there’s been a lot of moaning coming from the Royal Suite.

Irish actor, Liam Neeson  has reportedly given up on his Catholic faith and is converting to Islam.

The Hollywood star, 59, was recently filming in Turkish city Istanbul and became fascinated with the Muslim faith during his stay.

Speaking to The Sun, he said: “The Call to Prayer happens five times a day and for the first week it drives you crazy, and then it just gets into your spirit and it’s the most beautiful, beautiful thing.

“There are 4,000 mosques in the city. Some are just stunning and it really makes me think about becoming a Muslim.”

Soon after speaking with The Sun,  Liam met with prominent Muslim clerics and mullahs from Turkey and reportedly has begun the conversion.

The actor was raised in Northern Ireland as a Catholic altar boy and was named after his local priest.

On his Catholic beliefs, he said: “I was reared a Catholic but I think every day we ask ourselves, not consciously, what are we doing on this planet? What’s it all about?

“I’m constantly reading books on God or the absence of God and atheism.”

Neeson stars in the action/thriller, The Grey, which follows a number of men stranded in Alaska after a plane crash, and forced to survive using little more than their wits as a pack of wolves comes after them.  It opens this weekend, January 27th.

Neeson has reportedly been seen reading a Koran and was in the middle of a meeting in Hollywood he left the room to bow to Mecca.

Could it be true?