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Monthly Archives: August 2008

BLAKE ANGUISH AT OPEN

James Blake and US hopes have crashed at the US Open.
Blake lost a close match despite being powered by a strong serve, superior forehand and the protein nourishment that his nightly diet of thousands of mosquitoes provides.

Alien Dentistry!

Orthodontist Gerald Fixit was sleeping soundly when he was abruptly awakened by a rumbling. “My house started to shake,” said Fixit. “There were intense, bright lights shining into my window, blinding me.

AMERICAN BAT BOY

The Weekly World News continues its crusade of exposing Bat Boy’s true nature by presenting this new discovery. It appears that he may have developed the very frightening power of mind control.

Smoking Puppies!

Faced with dying customers, restrictive laws, and lawsuits from smokers who get sick from using their product, cigarette companies have been on a desperate search for a new customer base. Now they believe they’ve found it.

A Real Copy Cat!

Widow Katie Watson’s strange adventure began when she noticed a stray gray cat hanging around her house. Soon, though, Watson realized that Felix was more than just an unusually affectionate cat.

BAT BOY BRO-IN-LAW

Shortly after introducing his sister, Michelle Obama, CRAIG ROBINSON flew off into the Denver night to devour mosquitoes.

Bigfoot Duck Hunting!

Brothers Luke and Rob Wiley were sitting by Sumter Lake early one morning, preparing their duck decoys, when they heard loud footsteps in the woods behind them. “We assumed it was another hunter,” said Rob.