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ALIENS KILLING PERU’S DOLPHINS

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LIMA – Peru’s government is blaming an alien infiltration for the unexplained killing of thousands of dolphins.

Dolphins have been washing ashore by the dozens since last year. Fishermen have reported scores of dead dolphins on beaches all along the coast.

While Peruvian government officials deny the claim, scientists at the Instituto Peruano de Contacto Extraterrestre (IPCE) confirm the rumor that aliens are attacking and killing the dolphins.

Oswaldo Miranda, IPCE’s director of exploratory investigations, explains, “Everyone is asking, why dolphins? Why not snakes or mosquitoes? It’s an easy answer, really. People love dolphins. They like to swim with them, take pictures of them. Children love them. This is a statement killing. The aliens, wherever they’re from, are taking an aggressive stance. It’s like leaving a horse head in the bed of Peru.”

Strangely, tourism is on the increase in many coastal Peruvian towns. Visitors are flooding the beaches, waiting for dolphins to wash up. They haven’t been disappointed. At least 5,600 dead dolphins have been counted since officials started tracking the deaths in March.

WWN contacted the U.N. Panel on Extraterrestrials for comment.  Dr. John Malley, the leader of the Panel, met with the IPCE and told them that the aliens are clearly from Planet Gootan.  “The Gootans have been ramping up their attacks on mammals on the planet, and it’s only a matter of time before they attack humans,”  Malley said.

The United Nations has sent a task force down to Peru to monitor the situation.