DRUID HILLS, KY – Dead chickens dropped from the Kentucky sky this morning!
A large number of dead chickens dropped from the Kentucky Sky on I-64 near Druid Hills. This chicken dropping comes just days after thousands of blackbirds dropped from the Arkansas and Louisiana skies and hundreds of jackdaws dropped from the skies in Sweden.
Authorities said that the Kentucky Chicken Drop was definitely related to the mysterious bird deaths in Arkansas Louisiana and Sweden. “It’s all part of the alien invasion,” said Dr. John Malley, an extraterrestrial expert who is a chief researcher for the U.N. Panel on Extraterrestrials. “We have long known that when aliens attack on Earth, they go after the birds first.”
According to Kentucky Parks and Wildlife Department’s Media Communication Director, Susan Begley, this is the first time that chickens have ever fell from the sky AND the first time that chickens have ever flown IN the sky.
Dr. Begley said that she believed that the aliens probably stunned the chickens with laser guns, sent them into the air, then killed them in the sky and watched them drop to their deaths.
Local residents were stunned. “I ain’t never seen no chicken fly. Not that high. Maybe five feet of the ground. But these chickens they looked like they were about a thousand feet up there. My pastor told us that when chickens fall from the sky, that means the world is gonna end. And I believes him!”
“It’s typical alien behavior,” said Dr. Malley. “These aliens are clearly from Planet Zeeba. They are going to play with us. They seem to enjoy it. They made the chickens fly, then they killed them. We at the U.N. are very, very concerned.
Representatives of Kentucky Fried Chicken quickly went to scene of the droppings and tried to gather as many chickens as possible. “We’re thinking of making these chickens a specialty on the menu – at least in Kentucky,” said Dwayne DeTorres of Kentucky Fried Chicken. “These chickens are going to fry up real nice.”
KFC got busy right away. Here’s the first four chickens they rounded up:
Some authorities thought there was some significance to the fact that the birds dropped into Druid Hills. “I think this aliens are trying to tell us that they don’t like pagans. Maybe these aliens from Planet Zeeba are Christians,” said Dale Boomlie of Paducah.
Well, it’s all still a mystery. But if you are in Kentucky, keep your head up… you may see a chicken heading for you!