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ILLEGAL SPACE ALIENS


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HOLBROOK, AZ – A group of 21 aliens has taken refuge in the heart of the Petrified Forest National Park – and they’re asking President Obama for asylum!

“They came to Earth to escape religious persecution on their own planet,” says attorney Betty Montrose, who represents the extraterrestrial immigrants. “And they’ve settled here in America because of our reputation as the ‘great melting pot.’

“Although their technology is light-years ahead of our own, the government on their home planet is tyrannical and cruel. They’ve come hoping to build a new life here in the land of the free.

“And I’m acting as their counsel. So far we’ve had two visits with President Obama, but nothing has been decided yet.”

Mrs. Montrose, who retired from her law practice and moved here in 2003, will not reveal the exact location where the aliens wait, hoping against hope that the government will grant them political asylum. But their settlement is somewhere in the Petrified Forest, north of the Zuni Indian Reservation.

Mrs. Montrose is determined to win them the right to stay here. But she’s not without her critics.

“We have enough freeloaders flooding the borders,” says one Arizona state official.

“Why should hardworking Americans be asked to pick up the tab for yet another group of maladjusted outsiders?”

But Mrs. Montrose calls the criticisms unfair and biased. “These beings are intelligent, well-behaved and law-aiding,” the lawyer told reporters. “And unlike some others who are seeking citizenship, they speak perfect English.”

Some experts foresee serious psychological problems for the refugees themselves if Obama okays their request.

“The difficulties of integrating themselves into our culture will put great stress on them,” says a therapist who has interviewed the alien delegation. “Their entire lives have been spent in a totally different world. It will take them five or six generations to adapt.”

President Obama has not commented on the situation. But Washington sources expect a decision by early January.